A Baby Scare!

Well, I spent all last night in the emergency room.  I was hurting down my right side (all the way into my toes).  I was scared to death of an ectopic pregnancy, so I decided to go staight to the hospital.  They did an ultrasound, and the dr. discovered a 3 cm cyst on my right ovary.  They said it is probably the corpus luteum cyst.  Anyway, it has been leaking behind the uterus, and that is what is most likely causing the pain.  The baby is way to small to see, but you could see the gestational sack.  I was just 5 weeks as of yesterday.  I have to go back to Jacksonville for an ultrasound on Saturday. I am hoping to be able to see the yolk sac by then.  I am ready to see some form of life in there.  My hcg levels at the hospital were 3300.  On Monday, they were 1,036.  They are doubling nicely, and that makes me feel so much better.  The cramping has eased off today, but I am still worried that the cyst might rupture.  I am leaving it in God's hands, and I am going to rest as much as I can, and try to stay positive.  I have decided to go ahead and start my registry.  I know it is wayyyyy early, but I have to do something to bring positive thoughts into my mind.  Stress is definetly not going to help a baby stay healthy.  The hospital also gave me a disc of my ultrasound images to bring home with me.  That was super nice of them I think! 

The rest of the kids are hanging in there.  I will update more about them hopefully this afternoon.  I have to get back to work for now.

Update on the Family and Baby

Well, I went to Jacksonville today for more blood work to make sure the pregnancy is viable.  My numbers all looked wonderful.  I go back June 3rd for my first ultrasound.  I am nervous, excited, scared, and amazed all at the same time.  So many emotions and feelings are rushing through me.  I spent the day waiting for results, so I passed the time shopping with my sister.  We went to Babies R Us and Buy Buy Baby!  I could spend days and days in there looking at all of the gidgets and gadgets. 

The kids are all doing pretty well.  They are all much better since Brandon left.  We are still having trouble with arguing, snatching, pushing, and just being mean to each other in general.  Can't live in a perfect world I guess! 

Jacob isn't very happy about the baby right now.  He is scared that he will not get a much attention, and that the baby will get more attention than him (his words).  I understand these emotions, and we are going to do everything we can to make sure they all feel included before and after the baby comes. 

Alexia asked if I was going to love the baby more than I love them because this one is from my stomach (her words).  My answer was No!  I love them all the same amount, but I love them each in their own way.  They are all special to me in a way that the others aren't.  Alexia was my first girl, Hunter was my first boy, Jacob is my comedian, Michael has a smile that melts your heart, Cassadie is super helpful, and Skylar is my peanut.  They all have their own special little place tucked away in my heart.  All of their special places are the same size, and they don't have to share that space with any of the other children.  The new baby will be no different. 

We explained that the new baby will get more attention, because babies have to be taken care of.  They can not feed or dress themselves.  They can not go potty or tell you what is wrong.  Every baby gets extra attention in the beginning, and this is something that Jacob is just going to have to come to terms with.  However, I will try to make it enjoyable instead of painful. 

I still can not believe that I am pregnant.  As of today, my HCG is 1,036.  I can't believe it climbed that high in two days.  I was so worried that it would not double.  I was also freaked out about ectopic pregnancy, but the nurse said my numbers were so good that she doesn't think ectopic pregnancy is an issue.

All I do is hiccup and fart.  The horrible ugly truth!!!  I still have some random cramps and my instinct is to go and see if I have started my period.  Then it dawns on me that I am pregnant.  I feel better a little, but I still have some mother worries.  From what I understand, most new mothers worry themselves silly for the first trimester.  In 9 more weeks, my first trimester will be over.  So close, but so far away!  I want to enjoy my pregnancy, but I am scared to let go! 

A Terrible Trip and a Baby Surprise!

Okay, so two Fridays ago, my two fifth graders had a field trip to Disney World.  My husband and I went on the trip with them.  The charter bus we rode on had very little air, a non-working toilet, and no light in the little bathroom.  We got stuck sitting by the toilet!!!  Yuck!  The trip to Disney was alright, but we also got stuck with six other children to chaperone, while the fifth grade teachers walked around with no children.  I didn't pay 500 dollars for a trip that I had to do more work than the teachers on.  Then, on the way home, the bus broke down.  We were almost four hours from home!!!!  We were stuck on the side of the interstate for almost 6 hours.  Finally, we got off the interstate thanks to the Florida State Troopers, and we were taken to a service center.  Here we waited for a school bus to arrive from our home town (another 3 hours).  My husband got sick, so we got a taxi and went to a hotel.  We rented a car the next day and explored Orlando.  We just made a fun day out of it, because the previous day had been so crappy.  Why were we stuck so long on the interstate?  Well, because our school would not let our children get on any other mode of transportation due to liability!!!

So, for the surprising news!  I found out Thursday that I am pregnant.  After 10 years of trying (and failing), we are pregnant!!!  I went to the doctor on Friday to confirm.  All bloodwork came back amazing, and I am going back tomorrow to make sure all of my numbers are doubling.  I am nervous and excited!  I am scared too!!!  I have been waiting for this for so long, it still doesn't seem real!

The Teenager Strikes Again

Well, even though the teenager is gone, he is still causing us grief.  We got a phone call from his stepfather.  Brandon was over there yelling and cussing (acting crazy as usual).  The law had to be called to him, because he refused to do anything he was asked to do (like calm down and stop cussing).  I will be so glad when our guardianship is done away with.  I know for sure that he can not come home.  Never again will one of my children be afraid to close their eyes in their own bedroom. 

On another note, we went do Disney World and had a horrible experience.  We were left stranded on the side of the interstate with 50 fifth graders for 6 hours.  I don't have time to discuss it at the moment, but I will be back a little later.  Off to work I go!

My Little Peanut

Well, life at our house has been up and down.  Since the teenager left, my others have reacted in extremely different ways.  Alexia and Hunter were always the ones in the most trouble.  Since Brandon left, they are sweet, kind, smiling, laughing, helping, and all around better behaved.  Mikey and Cassadie are same ol' same ol'.  Jacob is trying to take on the new role of older brother, so he is trying to direct everyone, which could be a good thing if he would start his conversations with "God, are you stupid?  Or, "Stop being retarded."  Not be constructive there Mr. Jacob.  Guess where he learned that from.  You guessed it....the teenager!  No I have to reprogram him to be a helpful big brother, instead of a hurtful one. 

On to my little peanut!  She is struggling the most.  It is absolutely heartbreaking.  She called him "bubby," and she loved him with her whole heart.  She was the only one he was nice to, and he was very loyal to her.  Maybe because she was the baby in the family???  I don't know!  Whatever the reason, she loved him and he loved her.  Now that he is gone, she feels so lost!  She is getting in trouble at school and at home.  She is acting out in such a big way, and that is so sad to me.  She has a heart of gold, and I have always considered her my least damaged child.  We got her when she was two, so she did not have to endure the ugly foster care system to the extent that the others did.  Her teacher says she is getting a nasty attitude in class, refusing to listen, and pouting multiple times a day.  Guess what??? She is doing the same thing at home!  I am at a loss!  She feels abandoned, and I empathize with her.  However, I am not going to condone her acting out.  Our family went out today, and she had to stay home and do extra chores since she could not be a productive and positive member of the group.  I was going to let her go, and she was completely dressed.  Then she blew it!  She had a meltdown over a plastic cup!  Someone was drinking out of the plastic cup that she was going to drink out of!  Really??? You are going to ruin your entire day over a plastic cup???  We have dozens of plastic cups!  I hope she passes this phase soon.  I want to comfort her, because she endured a loss, but I also feel she needs consequences for her actions.  Where is the balance?  Where is the instruction manual that should come with these little boogars???